“What happens when you get angry? You try to stay positive but suddenly you get really mad and negative. Are you undoing everything you worked toward? Is there anything you can do to get back on track and stay on track? Here is what you need to know.
Anger is a human emotion. All emotions have their time and place. However, some people have convinced us that anything is okay because it is human. Well, yes and no. You could have a mostly marvelous, incredible, happy life, but most aren’t taught to.
Some are taught it is unrealistic. Others are taught, or conditioned that, you must be sad and angry sometimes, so don’t try to be happy all the time. Neither is accurate or useful. Yes, all emotions are part of the human experience and we may feel them any time. Accept it.
Usually When People Are Sad They Do Nothing But Cry About It …
For example, grief has its place. Accept and allow it. Take some time and then move forward. Those who can’t, need extra assistance, perhaps, but, like the rest, they could, if and when, they learn how to. It has its place but it shouldn’t be a permanent place. Get it?
Sadness, frustration, anger all have their place. All are useful to make changes. Each informs us that something is going on. Each informs us what we are thinking about and paying attention to, either consciously or unconsciously. Each gets our attention. All are good.
Each emotion is useful for the information it presents us with. It lets us know something is out of whack. Most of us have been conditioned to believe we are helpless when it comes to emotions. They happen to us and are out of our control. This is not accurate.
… When People Get Angry They Can Bring About Change
We can utilize any and all of them, as we learn how. Once we understand what the message is, we can move forward. We are not meant to be stuck in any of them. We are meant to have a mostly, wonderful, joyous experience, and we can when we learn how.
All of the ‘negative’ emotions, none are actually negative, but we classify them, so we can distinguish them from the others, are useful. Classification helps us determine where we are on our path, what is going on and what we need to move from and move towards.
Whenever we feel less than glorious, stop, and become aware of the thoughts you are thinking. You will discover they are mostly not supportive and may be debilitating. You felt ‘bad’ or ‘off. This IS a signal that your thinking is amiss. Hooray! Now you can change it.
Direct Your Anger Away From People And Toward Positive Change
Only if you want to and if you will do what is necessary. You’ ll continue in the habits you have grown accustomed to unless you change and do something different. You have the opportunity, now, to think supportive thoughts and change your feelings. Get it?
Rage has its place. Rage is good when it harms no one. Rage is good if you get to the deciding point of ‘never again’. When you get to, ‘I will never again do this, or let this happen. I will take charge and make good things happen.’ That is a good place. You can change then.
If you think, ‘I’ll show them. I’m not stupid. I’m not a loser!’ Whatever it is change it to, ‘I’m smart. I’m winner and successful’. Decide to quit the non-supportive behavior for a more supportive one. You declare and decide, ‘No more! No longer!’ Not that BUT this!
Realize All Negative Emotions Are Meant To Be Temporary
You change everything. You move forward massively, or even bit by bit, at a time, incrementally. Either works for you. You put an end to non-supportive behaviors and move toward supportive behaviors because you got fed up, had enough, and FINALLY decided. GET IT?
You use the energy from the rage to stop being mad and start being productive. It is the catalyst, the impetus. You may explosively move toward positivity because you FINALLY had enough of the negativity, or the poverty, or the sadness, or the wimpy-ness. Get it?
Change stems from that powerful decision! You got fed up! You got fed up with being fed up. You decide to take control. When you decide that, it is the beginning, when everything changes. Your strong, robust decision makes all the difference. You take charge.
Use Negative Emotions To Make Positive Changes – Do It Now
Be glad. Be happy. Feel good! The best thing you can do minute to minute is learn how to feel your best. Enjoy it. Live life. Think positive and optimistic and feel as good as you can. The more you do the easier it becomes. The only reason you don’t is from old habit.
All the ‘negative’ emotions can be useful. However, some have more energy behind them that you can utilize. Consider the energy behind sadness, boredom, frustration, anger and rage. Rage is much more powerful and active. Sadness is depressed. Boredom is ho-hum.
When you are angry you can change it from being destructive, as you can with any emotion, into being beneficial, if you become aware of your thoughts and redirect them in a useful direction. Remember, to shift from the negative to the positive. You must do this to change.
Stop Getting Stuck In Negativity – Better To Be Stuck In Positivity
It’s a skill you get better at, the more you do it. As with anything, perfect practice makes perfect. You practiced and mastered all your old, non-supportive habits. Now is the time to practice and master supportive habits. I’ll continue to help show you how. Okay?
Learn to use everything to make your life more of what you want. You don’t have to wallow or be a victim of anything. You can get and be free. You can live your best life ever. You can create the life you deserve. Only if you are willing to learn and willing to change.
You must do things differently, from what you have done previously. You keep all your prior resourcefulness, make a few simple changes, and apply them to live a more incredible life. Get it? Meanwhile, learn to feel blessed in all things. Practice gratitude. This will immediately begin to make life more wonderful. Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes
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Horizons photo used with permission of Phil Koch.
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