“Questions can change your life because they can change the direction of your thinking. There is immense power in asking questions. The Socratic Method has been around for a long time. I didn’t invent questions, but I revolutionized their use when I introduced Directed Questions™ to the world in the early 80s. Many have attempted to recreate this process and have greatly missed. Still, there’s great power in asking questions.

One question to ask that’s become popular is the question ‘why.’ It has the power to change your life. It’s a small word, yet it opens the door to deep insights, personal transformation, and success. However, early in the NLP days we attempted to ask other questions to provide far more flexibility and direction. Historically, therapists asked ‘why’ almost exclusively. The goal in NLP was to provide more flexibility and direction than they had.

‘Why’ is great and I encourage you to ask it but it’s not the only question to ask. When you learn Directed Questions™ a whole new world opens for you. But, for not, let’s explore ‘why.’ When you ask yourself ‘why’ about your goals, desires, and actions, you unlock the reasons behind what drives you. Understanding this can shape your path forward with more clarity, purpose, and motivation.

DEVELOP THE POSITIVE ATTITUDE, MINDSET AND BELIEFS TO TRANSFORM YOURSELF

Knowing what’s important and why it’s important can turn vague ambitions into specific, actionable steps, guiding you to what you truly value. Asking ‘why’ is powerful and can change the way you approach your goals and life. Consider; Why do you want to achieve a certain goal? It may seem like a simple question, but the answer reveals a lot. Remember, questions direct your thinking. They direct what you find, discover and can then utilize.

When you ask yourself why you want something, whether it’s career success, financial freedom, or personal happiness, you start to uncover the motivations and emotions driving you. If you ask yourself, ‘Why do I want financial independence?’ You might answer, “Because I want freedom.” Dig deeper: ‘Why do I want freedom?’ Your answer might be, ‘So I can spend more time with my family, pursue my passions, and live stress free.’

You’ve uncovered the deeper meaning behind your desire for wealth AND it’s not just money. It’s about a lifestyle filled with purpose and connection. Your family relationship, your passions and how you feel is more important than just making more money. This clarity helps you focus your energy on what matters most and not just on superficial desires. It’s not about the money or the status; it’s about the life you want to create with it!

DEVELOP THE POSITIVE ATTITUDE, MINDSET AND BELIEFS TO TRANSFORM YOURSELF

Asking ‘why’ helps you tap into your inner drive. It clarifies the emotional reasons behind your goals, providing you with the fuel you need to stay motivated. Once you understand your true motives, you gain a powerful source of energy that will keep you moving forward, even when challenges arise. When you understand your ‘why,’ you unlock a reservoir of strength that can help you persevere when the going gets tough. Get this. It adds to you!

Asking ‘why’ helps you see the bigger picture and how everything is connected. You begin to understand the cause-and-effect relationship between your actions and their outcomes. When you know the reasons behind your desires, you can create a roadmap to achieving them. You can ask, ‘why is this important to me’ and discover deeper answers. If your goal is to be in better health, ask yourself why that matters to you.

Is it to feel more energetic, live longer for your family, or achieve personal mastery? When you understand the real reason behind your desire for health, it becomes easier to stay committed to exercising, eating right, and avoiding unhealthy habits. Asking ‘why’ helps you see beyond the immediate gratification of achieving a goal. You begin to grasp how this goal fits into the larger picture of your life, relationships, and long-term happiness.

DEVELOP THE POSITIVE ATTITUDE, MINDSET AND BELIEFS TO TRANSFORM YOURSELF

One of the most important aspects of asking ‘why’ is to get into the present moment. Many people think of their ‘whys’ as future goals. Goals somewhere off in the distance. They might say, ‘I want to be successful so that one day I can be happy.’ But this keeps your happiness and success perpetually out of your reach. Instead, ask yourself, ‘Why can I be happy now? Why can I be successful today?’ Focus on your present. Get to here and now.

By focusing on now, you realize the conditions for your desires can be found in your current situation. You just didn’t notice them because you thought they might be available at another time, so you missed out. Now, right this moment there are infinite possibilities, opportunities and resources available to you but you miss them because of your current mindset. That’s why, WHY and asking Directed Questions™ makes such a difference.

For example, if you want more confidence, instead of waiting until you achieve something big, ask yourself why you can be confident now. You might find that you already possess skills, experiences, or traits that make you capable and deserving of confidence today. This shift in mindset helps you to start living the life you want now, rather than constantly chasing a distant future. In fact, most of what you want is always available right now.

DEVELOP THE POSITIVE ATTITUDE, MINDSET AND BELIEFS TO TRANSFORM YOURSELF

Some notable people have used the power of ‘why’ to shape their success: Simon Sinek’s famous TED Talk, “Start With Why,” emphasizes the importance of understanding your deeper purpose. He argues that great leaders and successful organizations are driven by a strong sense of ‘why’ – a clear understanding of their purpose or cause. Companies like Apple don’t just sell products; they’re driven by the desire to inspire innovation.

Steve Jobs didn’t just want to make money or build a company. He wanted to revolutionize the way people interacted with technology, to change the world by creating beautiful, intuitive products. That ‘why’ drove him to build Apple, through countless failures and setbacks. His motivation was not just profit, it was about impact and innovation, and that’s what kept him pushing the boundaries. Notice profit came from wanting to help others.

Malala Yousafzai is the youngest Nobel Prize laureate. She knew exactly why she fought for girls’ education. Her ‘why’ was simple but powerful. She believed every girl should have the right to education, and her personal experiences drove her mission. Her understanding of ‘why gave her the strength to stand up to the Taliban, even after being targeted and attacked, because she knew her cause was bigger than herself.

DEVELOP THE POSITIVE ATTITUDE, MINDSET AND BELIEFS TO TRANSFORM YOURSELF

I sure wish more people fought for the rights of girls, boys and people all over the world. Don’t you? I’ve proved a few examples of people who used their ‘why’ to change their lives and the lives of others. Now it’s your turn. What do you want? More importantly, why do you want it? Take time today to ask yourself these questions. Write down your answers and keep digging deeper until you uncover the true motivation behind your goals.

Don’t stop at the first answer. Each answer is a steppingstone to that most important value, the big why, your deepest motivation. Remember, when you ask yourself ‘why,’ you gain clarity, motivation, and focus. You connect with the bigger picture and align yourself with your true desires. Most importantly, you begin to see opportunities in the present moment, rather than placing your happiness off in the distant future. Also understand this.

Why is a powerful question. It also has its limitations. As I mentioned, early therapists were limited by only having one predominant question to ask. Flexibility is key. More than that, it’s important not to ask questions by rote. I refused to put out a list of questions for people to ask because it is about asking YOU OWN questions and discovering how to craft them. Directed Questions™ is powerful because it’s not a list but a powerful process.

DEVELOP THE POSITIVE ATTITUDE, MINDSET AND BELIEFS TO TRANSFORM YOURSELF

You have the power to create the life you want. Start today by asking yourself ‘why.’ Then start acting on those answers. That’s where transformation begins. It begins there but doesn’t end there. Use this question today to begin making changes and know there is so much more than this first step. It can open the door, but you want to and must step through it to get through it. Questions direct your mind.

You can discover so much that is positive and wonderful when you understand this. Ask. Another important, very important point is the answer is not the only thing that is important. Learning the process is superior to the answer. The answer frequently is a stopping point. What’s the capital of your state? When you have the answer, you are done. That is ask and answer. Not a big deal. The inquiry is what is important, so you want to learn how to ask to most directly, efficiently and powerfully direct your mind. That’s why I developed Directed Questions™. Celebrate everything!!” Rex Sikes

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Infographic ©2024 Rex Steven Sikes & Rex Sikes Entertainment, LLC

Photograph ©2024 Rex Steven Sikes & Rex Sikes Entertainment, LLC