“Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence,” a saying popularized by Carl Sagan was coined by a forensic bloodstain pattern analyst to point out that not finding a fingerprint means nothing more than that. No fingerprints were found.
A positive statement can’t be made from a negative finding. This is good to understand because many people misunderstand this and draw false conclusions. If you can’t pay your rent this month, some people assume you will always be broke or have money trouble.
If you aren’t presently in a loving relationship you are destined to be lonely or are unloveable. If you didn’t get the job you wanted desperately you will never amount to anything or have a career. None of this is accurate. None of these conclusions are true.
Stop Doing What You’ve Always Done To Get Better Results
All it means is this month I can’t meet the rent. At this time I’m not in a relationship I desire to be. At this time I didn’t get a job. There’s no evidence that anything else is true, just these things. Still, we project and assume it must mean something more about us than it does.
This is part of the conditioning we grew up with. Assignments made about our behavior means something about our identity. You didn’t win the 2nd grade 3 legged race means you aren’t good at anything. You stole cookies from the cupboard means you are a bad person.
You got failing grades in school means you are stupid and can’t learn. Some utter the ‘evidence’ statement this way. Lack of evidence is not evidence of lack. Because you have money problems now doesn’t mean you’re a failure, or that money isn’t available now or later.
Update And Upgrade Your Attitude & Self-Image With Ease
We are time-binders and meaning-makers. We have a tendency to exaggerate. If we have this problem now it means something is wrong with us for all time, BUT it doesn’t. It only means right now we are working through an issue. Anything is still possible.
There’s no proof our conclusions are true. Yet, this is the tendency we have. We look for validation that our conclusion is accurate (when it is not) and we find some other examples and then exclaim, ‘See. I told you I was stupid.’ We generalize the instances as forever.
Throughout all time and space, anywhere and everywhere because I lost the 3 legged race I’m not good at anything and can’t learn. Because I did poorly in school I am a failure and stupid forever and always through all time and space. I can’t possibly be otherwise.
Stop doing Things The Same Expecting Things To Be Different
‘Look, these examples prove it’s true!’ We see what we believe. If we look for proof of what’s wrong, we may always find it. It’d be more useful to not make things you did or didn’t do about you, but keep them at the level of behaviors. They’re your actions, not you!
‘I lost a 3 legged race. If I practice more I may get better and eventually win. Maybe not, but I am good. I’m just not as efficient a runner as I might be. I’m still a good person and can do many other things well. Focus on what I can do. Seek to improve what I can.’
‘I’ve learned all kinds of things in life. I learned to walk and talk. I learned to tie my shoes. I can learn all sorts of things. I did poorly on that test but I can study more and maybe do better. I learn many things well. Some things quite easily. I am smarter than I think.’
Nothing Really Changes Until You Change Old Conditioning
‘I don’t have money right now, or a relationship but both money and love is all around me. I live in a universe with plenty. I can have both. Because lack of evidence is not evidence of lack. I can learn to make, invest and save money. I can love myself and also discover love too.’
Stop drawing conclusions that limit you. Learn instead to get free of your previously conditioned thinking. Let go of less than glorious conclusions because you can’t travel uphill thinking downhill thoughts. You are better than you think you are. Get it?
Your brain looks for matches. It seeks to prove you correct. We use the term ‘confirmation bias’ to say we can believe some pretty goofy messed up things, adhere to them AND look to prove ourselves right regarding them. Because we were conditioned, it’s better to be right.
Easily Activate Your Attitude And Delight In Greater Success
It’s appropriate to be right about certain things and to be willing to be wrong about other things. You are infinite potential with infinite possibilities. All the good you might experience is hidden from you because you believe you don’t deserve it. Or something else.
Stop believing lies. Learn to let go. Seek the best in you. Look to your higher-self. Whatever you focus on IS what you get. Your reality IS what you think it to be. Even when your reality is not accurate or the ultimate reality, your thinking makes it so TO you! You think it is!
STOP! Think better of yourself. Don’t be egotistical, but don’t make false assumptions or attributions either. Because you presently don’t have money doesn’t mean you are poor or always destined to be poor. You aren’t stupid. You aren’t bad. You can have a loving relationship. You are good at some things and better at some other things. Anything can be improved if you want to improve it. Understand, a lack of evidence is not evidence of lack. Get it? Celebrate everything!” Rex Sikes
GET LIFE ON YOUR TERMS AND CHANGE YOUR LIFE
“Rex is absolutely brilliant and transparent. My go-to book for those I mentor who want to be happy and successful with their lives as they choose.” – Fred Van Lieu ‘The Water Doctor,’ Author
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©2020 Infographic Rex Steven Sikes & Rex Sikes Entertainment, LLC
©2020 Cover Rex Steven Sikes & Rex Sikes Entertainment, LLC