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no excuses - when you really matter

“With technology comes advances. There is no doubt we are better off the more we have invented.  As we advance the same technology can create problems. Nothing is inherently good or evil. A hammer can be used to build or tear down.

Social Media Is Separating Us and Dividing Us

We don’t ‘connect’ as we used to. Instead of calling and speaking we text each other. Often, we group text or we tweet followers and post to friends on social media. It is devoid of human speaking and listening and give and take.  Frequently, we are just posting or reading announcements on walls or watching video without any give and take.

Enter a room anywhere today and you will see people staring at their devices instead of talking together.  Most all of them gazing at their phone are gaming, or texting or reading or watching some media. Human interaction is limited and if there is any at all in that room it is through electronics with someone somewhere else.

This prevalent form of ‘staying connected’ is not meaningful contact. We are not actually talking and listening to or trying to understand anyone anymore. These are not conversations where meaning and understanding are important.

These are written notes littered with abbreviations and emoticons. We don’t hear their voice and their expression we read texts in our voice with our expression. Because we don’t listen or look we assume and misinterpret. Since we don’t actually talk we don’t actually connect.

We think we are more connected through electronics and social media but we may actually be more isolated and less exposed to diverse thinking, cultures and people. A room full of people all on their devices instead of interacting together is not a coming together.

Living Through Your Phone Or Lens Is Not Living

Watching a documentary on an African town is not the same as visiting the town and getting to know and experience the people. We are missing out on actual experiences. We opt to live vicariously rather than to really live. We have become passive observers, shielded behind our mobil devices, rather than participants in life.

Instead of it making us better it lessens our experiences and feelings. It allows us to escape. It preoccupies us. Instead of meeting the new person sitting next to you you retreat into the reliable escape of entertainment.

You game, watch youtube, text someone, read FB to avoid an actual real life encounter with the people right there with you. You are shut off not involved. You are limited and not expanding.

Give It A Rest And Take A Break

Make time for family and friends. Shut off your phones and put them away. Have some real face time with the people you love and care about. PUT THE MOBIL DEVICE AWAY. Your children OR your parents deserve YOU and your uninterrupted time and attention. Don’t deprive them.

Don’t be tempted to answer the call or the text. The person in front of you is more important, most likely, than the person texting in. Most texts and phone calls can wait. Make time for people in your life. Make time for your loved ones! Respect each other!

Respect the other person by giving your undivided attention. Give your complete attention without checking your FB wall. It is rude to be constantly picking up your phone instead of listening and looking at the human with you. It is annoying to others to be conversing with you only to be interrupted by text tones and phone calls. Stop it!

Learn To Live Without Your Phone 

You will survive! Many people, if they forget their phone, panic. STOP IT! It is only a phone. Yes, it is shiny, has bangs and whistles and costs a fortune but it is no where near worth the value of your real friends and family who want to connect with you.

Put it aside. Learn to live without it so you can enjoy it without being addicted to it. If you forget it at home, so what, you will survive. Those feelings of ‘gotta have it’ are the feelings and the stressors you want to eliminate. Relax, it is only a phone. You will survive!

In olden, by gone days, (a few years back) no one had personal devices to stay in touch and for the most part the world went on and on anyway. It is a fallacy to think we need the phone just in case. That is a sense of immediacy and foreboding that is artificial and only causes worry and stress. You don’t need it.

Hug Not Hold

True, once and a while you had to make an important call or you might have missed an important call BUT life went on. There is no reason to be a slave to your electronic device. It is the people that are important not the devices. It is the human you can hug not the gadget you can hold that matters.

Relax. Schedule time to connect. Have a date night with your loved one or friends and turn off your phones. Leave the electronics behind. Make it a point to shut the phone off for half a day or more. You can do it even if it seems as though you can’t.

At the end of your life you won’t say, ‘If I had only spent more time texting and posting to Facebook. If I’d only answered the phone more often.’ I bet you are going to wish for more time with the people you love.

Do not cheat yourself of them of your time and attention. Realize right this instant what is important and who is important in your life right NOW!, Spend the quality time together you and they deserve.” Rex Sikes

Have a wonderful day. Connect with someone in a special way!

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