“I’ve learned to treat myself as a baby or at best a toddler. I’ve a pet phrase I’ve used for decades when conducting seminars and workshops, ‘You don’t punt the baby’. You do no harm. You don’t yell, scream or insult. You don’t criticize. It doesn’t help the child learn.
When a child is learning to walk or feed itself you nurture and encourage the child. You get all excited and act weird. If the child falls or misses its mouth with a spoon you don’t punt it out of the room and scream at it and shame it. You don’t if you love!
No. You encourage the child to continue in the behavior you want the child to learn. When the child does anything close to what you want it to learn you get wildly enthusiastic, goofy even, so that the child feels wonderful. You are delighted. You’re nurturing!
Learn To Change Your Thoughts And You Transform Your Life
When I screw up I think of myself as a baby learning new things. I encourage myself instead of criticizing. Instead of thinking, I’m stupid, useless and unable to learn, I celebrate that I recognized I was off base, and give myself a pat on the back. A real pat!
Then gently, positively I steer myself back on track. I adjust and continue. Nurturing helps one learn faster than making one feel bad and ashamed. Positive reinforcement is more effective than negative. It works better to be encouraging loving and kind.
At one time, I was an expert in self-criticism. I decided to stop that and do something better for myself. If I can, you can! Now, consider this next point as well. I’ve used the analogy of a buffet. You put on your plate what you like and enjoy, that which brings you pleasure.
Learn To Change Your Thoughts And You Transform Your Life
Whatever you don’t like you leave on the buffet table. You don’t take it. Instead, you delight in what you enjoy and put that on your plate. You don’t think and complain about the food you don’t care for. You don’t lament foods you don’t like. Do you? I bet you don’t! Get this.
At a buffet, you focus on enjoying what you like. You go to one to get the foods you like. You don’t think about what you don’t want! You never even give it a second thought. Yet, people do this in life. They focus on and fret about what they don’t want. This is important!
Get this. Energy flows where attention goes. There’s no need to sift through the crap in your life; unwanted memories and disappointments, hurts and all the crap. They will come up all on their own at times. They do, so you can release and let them go.
Learn To Change Your Thoughts And You Transform Your Life
Focus on what you want. Focus on the good. Develop your attitude and express gratitude. Stop living a life complaining about what you don’t like and begin celebrating what you do. Focus on the good and you get more good. Get this. Concentrate on what is good!
Stop whining, focusing, complaining, blaming and making excuses for anything else. Life IS a buffet. Choose what you like and enjoy it. Focus on that and you can have more. Life’s too short to waste time on what you don’t want.
Stop focusing on less than glorious circumstances. Stop letting them dictate your life. Instead, take charge and create your own circumstances. Learn to use your imagination, change your thoughts and transform your life. Live as a victor, not a victim. Celebrate everything! Rex Sikes
Freedom can be yours BUT if you do nothing, nothing changes!
“This is by far the most comprehensive self help book on the market! And I’ve written 20 self help books all here on Amazon. Rex Steven Sikes is a genius for writing it and you would do well to get a copy if you truly want to change your life!” Dr LaVerne Adams, Author
“This may be the wisest, more realistic, and most helpful book I’ve come across. I’ve been a self-help book addict for at least five decades, and I’ve read many of the greats. This is up there with the greats and maybe beyond. Besides extraordinary insights, the style is accessible and compelling. I loved LIFE ON YOUR TERMS. Buy it!” Mitzi Perdue, Author, Entrepreneur (Perdue Chicken)
“Rex Sikes book ‘Life On Your Terms’ is truly, truly the ‘Think And Grow Rich’ of the 21st Century.” Dr. Jo Dee Nylander-Baer, Author
“This book ‘Life On Your Terms’ is loaded with powerful insights and ideas that motivate and inspire you to accomplish great things. Get ready to change your life in a wonderful way.” Brian Tracy, Author
“Life On Your Terms’ is a hall of fame level book written by Rex Steven Sikes. I am such a fan of this book. I truly think this is one of the greatest personal development books written of all time.” Moe Rock, Owner & Publisher The Los Angeles Tribune
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