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no excuses - when you really matter

“Is there anything worse than someone who does not keep their word?  When they break they promise they demonstrate that their promise to you is meaningless. It shows us that they have no willpower nor backbone in carrying out what they say they will.

It indicates that they are weak or they just don’t care enough for you to keep it. Their promise is empty just as the results they get are empty. They do not care. They are not loyal. Their word or promise is of no value. It sucks!

When someone breaks their promise to another person s/he lets the other person down. As a result of that disappointment and the bad feelings negative associations pile up. The person gets a reputation of being a ‘let down’, ‘a disappointment’ and of being an untrustworthy person. You don’t want that, do you?

Always Keep Your Word

You should always keep your word! Your word should be golden! It should be unbreakable! You should never give your word unless you keep your word. You should place a high-value on doing what you say you will.

If you won’t do what you say you will then you shouldn’t make any commitment in the first place. NEVER give your word unless you absolutely intend to keep it. Do not disappoint anyone by making a promise you won’t keep.

If you make excuses and blame circumstances you demonstrate you are not in charge of your life. You made a promise, broke it and then whine or complain that it isn’t your fault that something came up. No one cares about your reasons for failure they only know YOU did not deliver.

When you promise something you are claiming you will follow through. You are stating implicitly that YOU will deliver.

What Constitutes A Promise?

IS it only a promise when you say, ‘I promise’? HELL NO!  A promise is implied whenever you say you will do anything or offer to do anything. The promise is always inferred. It is understood that you intend to deliver. If you won’t deliver don’t say you will.

If you said, ‘Today, I’ll buy lunch’ but when the bill comes you say ‘Forget it’ what do you think people would think of you? Why would you offer if you weren’t going to? If you say, ‘I’ll meet you at noon Friday’, but don’t show up do you think they’d think you were cool?

If you told a child, ‘I will come by after school’ and then didn’t how might the child feel? Do you really want to do that to a kid? DO you want to let anyone down? Do you want to get the reputation that your word isn’t any good? It is important to do what you say you will.

Consider this: IF it is that important to keep your word to another person how  important is it to keep your word to yourself?

You Need To Keep Your Promises To Yourself

If you say today you are going to do the laundry do the laundry.  If you claim today you will not eat donuts DON’T eat the donuts.  If you say you are going to take out the trash every week on Wednesday then take out the trash every week.

It is just as bad to break your promise to yourself as it is to another person. When you break your promise to yourself you betray yourself. You create failure and disappointment. You give yourself a reason to berate yourself and feel negative about you. You lower your self esteem. You injure yourself! After all, you have let yourself down, yet again!

This disappointment can stimulate negative self-talk, you can re-live old disappointing memories. It provides you negative ammunition and takes the wind out of your sails. You don’t focus on the ‘can do’ but on the can’t or didn’t do. You can chalk up another reason why you are a failure.

There Is A High Cost To Breaking Your Promises

When you make a promise or give your word to anyone the expectations are that you will keep it. Your word is your bond! A person only has their word to give and nothing else. If you say, ‘I can give money’ the money is the item you promised. If you don’t give the money you broke your word. Do you get it? It’s what you say!

If you can’t be trusted to keep your word what have you? What are you worth? It would be better to not say or promise anything than to break your word.  If you’re not going to take the trash out every Wednesday, as you promised, don’t say that you’re going to.

The key to keeping your word is to find a way to give it that allows you to win when you do and that doesn’t gnaw away at you if you don’t.

Perhaps, you promise to  take the trash out every Wednesday unless something more important comes up. Then each week at the appropriate time you prioritize. If you don’t take the trash out THEN it is because something truly more important has come up. In this way you have kept your promise to yourself.

You have acted on the first most important item on your list. Then the next. You will take the trash out as you knock off the items before it. This way you are not only taking the trash out but, because you have prioritized, you are doing other important things as well. This makes it a win/win for you.

Following through on what you say you will is important to your health and well being. You  need to work your plans and feel good about yourself. You can’t feel optimum if you are disappointing yourself and others. No one wants to think, feel or be told (by yourself or someone else) ‘See I knew you’d let me down’.

Make Keeping Your Word A Habit

You can learn to make anything a habit if you want to. Start simple, start small and keep it easy. Each day make a short list of four or five taks you want to complete before the day’s end. If you prefer do it the night before.

Keep these things ones you can achieve. They should not be overwhelming or time consuming. They could be things like take the trash out. Call a friend or make that business call. Walk your pet. Straighten up your desk or work area before leaving. Practice piano, read a chapter in a book. Keep it easy enough to do.

Once you complete a task cross it off your list. When you have completed all on your list of things to accomplish notice how good it feels. Pat yourself on the back. Enjoy and celebrate your success. You might be amazed at how good you feel. Repeat this process the next day.

Spaced repetion is what makes a habit. Repeat the behavior your want to learn, again and again, each day and soon it will be a habit. As it becomes a habit your confindence will become stronger just as your muscles do when you exercise them repeatedly.

Soon you will be up to handling larger tasks and more important promises. You will have made follow through and completion a habit. When you want to or have to accomplish something really big or important you will be able to.

You will follow through and keep your word. You will do whatever it takes because you are a’can do’ person. That will make you feel even better again! You will build for yourself a success cycle.

You will feel better about you, believe in and trust yourself. You will enjoy and get known for keeping  your word. You’ll develop the reputation as one whose word is golden. Place a high priority on doing what you say you will and you will absolutely transform your life!” Rex Sikes

Have a great day!

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